Bar Brawl Boogie

The title really should be Bar Brawl Lawsuits but aren’t we all suckers for alliteration? And aren’t we all — especially me when I’m in a rush — loath to pick up Roget’s and find some sort of word that….

Never mind. Two neat items from today’s Daily News, via Daniel Beekman, Barbara Ross and Shayna Jacobs:

Beat vic sues in club melee

The victim in a boozy brawl at the New York Athletic Club’s swanky Tap Room slapped the club and his three alleged assailants with a lawsuit.

The suit filed Monday, which seeks unspecified damages, says the club should have cut off Peter Doran, Matthew O’Grady and Colin Drowica before they started throwing punches at sales exec Andrew Haesler last April.

Haesler claims he sustained a fractured eye socket. Criminal charges against three of the men are pending in Manhattan Criminal Court.

“Our bartenders are properly trained, and we really feel strongly this case has no merit,” said club spokesman James O’Brien.

And now for something not really very different:

Brown’s muscle sues Drake, club in tussle [cute rhyme scheme, huh? Can we call this a rap? Just asking…]

Chris Brown’s bodyguard is suing Drake and the SoHo nightclub where the hip-hop stars brawled last June — and is using the opportunity to take a swipe at the Canadian rapper.

Hired muscle Patrick Strickland snidely refers to Drake as “a popular and successful, albeit critically derided, entertainer,” in his Manhattan Supreme Court lawsuit filed Monday.

Strickland, 43, of Queens Village, claims the hot spot, W.i.P., is responsible for the ugly head cut he suffered during the melee because it sat Brown’s entourage and Drake’s near each other, even though staffers knew the celebrities were beefing over Rihanna.

The setup created “a substantial and unjustifiable risk,” the suit charges. In June, spokesmen for both stars denied that they were involved in starting or escalating the fracas. W.i.P. didn’t return an email Tuesday.

A few questions. Didn’t we already have this Drake-Brown brawl thing going on, like, years ago? And what kind of bodyguard is suing a nightclub for getting his head cut in a brawl? I mean, since he seems to be confessing that he’s not much of a bodyguard, maybe he should find another path to success.

But give him points for that pretty literate and dry, backhanded slap at Drake. I wonder if his lawyer wrote it (probably) and who that lawyer is?

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