Hang on just a sec! Let’s go back to those berserkers

The Encyclopedia Britannica’s full description of berserkers has given me a moment of déja vu. Take a look at this paragraph, after which I will explain what I’m thinking:

The berserkers’ savagery in battle and their animal-skin attire contributed to the development of the werewolf legend in Europe. It is unclear whether the berserker warriors wore bear and wolf skins into battle or fought bare-chested (i.e., without byrnies or mail shirts); tapestries and other sources represent both possibilities. The berserkers were in the habit of raping and murdering at will in their host communities (thus going “berserk”), and in the Norse sagas they were often portrayed as villains. In an Old Norse poem, most of which dates from the 9th century, berserkers are recorded as the household guard of Norway’s king Harald I Fairhair (reigned 872–930).

Do these madmen/werewolves remind you of anyone? Anyone? Oh, c’mon, how many times have you seen videos of January 6? Bear and wolf skins, or bare chests, and definitely villains. (Quite awfully, we will now have to wait until they rape and murder before they can be re-arrested; a day or so ago, one of the pardoned “patriots” was again arrested for possessing weapons — presumably in a state where open carry by criminals is frowned upon.)

And notice that “household guard” function in the last sentence. That’s what the pardoned Jan 6 criminals are, in effect. Presumably they’ll be rompin’ around Mar-a-Lago any day now, although possibly not the White House, since Federal Judge Amit Mehta banned Proud Boy leaders from Washington, D.C., and specifically from the Capitol.

I just read an essay by a guy about how Trump, et al. are gazing with starry eyes back into America in the 1850’s, wanting to drag us back there, pre-Civil War, where white boys had all the advantages. But this whole beserker thing suggests a roll-back to Norway pre-1000.

BTW, I’m no longer going to refer to “Trump and his minions,” or “et als.” Trump is The Minion, being ordered around by an unsavory and undoubtedly unruly mob of MAGA, um, intelligentsia, non-American plutocrats high on ketamine, and do not forget Putin. Trump’s entire function now is the one thing he is still able to do: apply his Sharpie signature to documents they hand him.)

Ergo, my advice for us resisters is to keep a supply of poisoned mead in one of those styrofoam coolers you can’t throw out because they’ll pollute our water. (That linked mead recipe does not include the poison; use your imagination and your local hardware store.)

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