![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/loweringthebar.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/babyshark.jpg?fit=300%2C169&ssl=1\")
<\/p>\nRead the whole thing by Kevin Underhill, for the full belly laugh experience:<\/p>\n
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The Oklahoman <\/em>reports<\/a> that two former detention officers and a supervisor at the Oklahoma County jail have been charged with cruelty after an investigation found they forced inmates to listen to \u201cBaby Shark\u201d for extended periods of time.<\/p>\n I\u2019m happy to say I\u2019ve never heard \u201cBaby Shark,\u201d nor did I listen to it for purposes of writing this piece. I mean, there are limits to what you can ask of me for doing this, believe it or not. But according to the report, \u201cBaby Shark\u201d is a children\u2019s song that became somewhat popular beginning about two years ago, as those of you who are parents most likely know, given that the YouTube video has now been viewed more than 6.5 billion<\/strong> times. While I haven\u2019t heard it, I did make the mistake of clicking on the \u201cBaby Shark lyrics\u201d link The Oklahoman <\/em>provided, which yielded this:<\/p>\n Baby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Just reading<\/em> that caused me to black out, or at least I assume that\u2019s why I woke up the other day under a highway bridge, covered in blood and what appear to be donut sprinkles, so I can only imagine what it would do to someone forced to actually listen<\/em> to it.<\/p>\n According to the report, the jail employees subjected at least four inmates to this, also forcing them to stand with their hands cuffed behind them while listening for up to two hours as the song played repeatedly. This of course meant they would be unable to cover their ears to block out the hellish tune with its nonsensical lyrics and brutal doo-doo-themed refrains.<\/p>\n The employees were charged with \u201cmisdemeanor cruelty,\u201d according to the report, which the district attorney recognized was not adequate given the conduct. \u201cIt was unfortunate that I could not find a felony statute to fit this fact scenario,\u201d said District Attorney David Prater. \u201cI would have preferred filing a felony on this behavior.\u201d<\/p>\n This appears to mean they were charged with \u201ccruelty to prisoners,\u201d an offense in the Prisons and Reformatories title (57 Okla. Stat. \u00a7 9) that can result in a jail term \u201cnot exceeding 12 months,\u201d making it a misdemeanor. That might<\/em> be appropriate depending on how loud the music was played. \u201cBaby Shark\u201d or no, subjecting someone to loud noises for extended periods of time could obviously damage their hearing, which might mean this could qualify as aggravated assault and battery under Oklahoma law. (It can also be torture under international law<\/a>.) That\u2019s a felony.<\/p>\n Or it might qualify as \u201cmaiming,\u201d which is defined as intentionally inflicting an injury that \u201cdisables any member or organ of [the] body or seriously diminishes [the victim\u2019s] physical vigor\u2026.\u201d 21 Okla. Stat. \u00a7 751. That\u2019s also a felony, though it seems to require actual injury, which wouldn\u2019t necessarily be a requirement for aggravated assault and battery. (It\u2019s also a crime to maim yourself<\/em> if you do it to \u201cdisable [yourself] from performance of any legal duty, existing or anticipated\u201d (21 Okla. Stat. \u00a7 752), but it\u2019s not clear what the penalty would be for that.)<\/p>\n Hopefully the failure to charge the jail employees under one of these felony statutes means the volume wasn\u2019t so loud that it could potentially have caused injury. Physical injury, I mean, not the psychological injury that would likely result from having to hear \u201cBaby Shark\u201d more than once in any two-hour period. But while it isn\u2019t a felony, the cruelty-to-prisoners statute still requires, not too surprisingly, \u201ccruel or inhuman\u201d treatment, and I think we need more facts to know whether that\u2019s what happened here.<\/p>\n No, you know what? I just glanced at those lyrics again. I think we have all the facts we need.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Read the whole thing by Kevin Underhill, for the full belly laugh experience: Jailers Who Subjected Inmates to \u201cBaby Shark\u201d Face Cruelty Charges Oct 16, 2020 05:00 am | Kevin The Oklahoman reports that two former detention officers and a … Continue reading
\nBaby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nBaby shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nBaby shark!
\nMommy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nMommy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nMommy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nMommy shark!
\nDaddy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nDaddy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nDaddy shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nDaddy shark!
\nGrandma shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandma shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandma shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandma shark!
\nGrandpa shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandpa shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandpa shark, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nGrandpa shark!
\nLet\u2019s go hunt, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nLet\u2019s go hunt, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nLet\u2019s go hunt, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nLet\u2019s go hunt!
\nRun away, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nRun away, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nRun away, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nRun away!
\nSafe at last, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nSafe at last, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nSafe at last, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nSafe at last!
\nIt\u2019s the end, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nIt\u2019s the end, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nIt\u2019s the end, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
\nIt\u2019s the end!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n