“Top Five Inanimate Objects to Use as Your Lawyer”

From Lawyerist.com. At first I figured it was from Lowering the Bar but no.

As an enticement and a giggle, below is the first illustration and paragraph from this marvelous, um. Piece of satire. I say this in case you lean toward taking this as responsible advice. (Some people don’t get satire, I’m not sure why. I know a few. Rather, I knew a few.)

In case you ever need to skip court, here are your “alternatives.”

Source: Top Five Inanimate Objects to Use as Your Lawyer


A man in Colorado brought a stuffed owl to court with him as his lawyer. According to news reports, the owl’s name is Solomon, and it was “just sitting in” until a public defender was assigned to the man’s case. Although the owl claimed to have law degrees from Yale, Harvard, and Stanford, it is unclear just how effective Solomon was in the courtroom. Still, this highly credentialed advocate probably charged a much lower hourly rate than your average lawyer. If you are considering hiring a lawyer and are wondering whether an inanimate object may better serve your needs, consider these alternatives.

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