Wanna rent a wizard? It’ll cost you $10K a year

When I first saw this…article, I thought: “See, New Zealand, this is what you get for hiring a wizard at an annual fee for, ahem, ‘acts of wizardry and other wizard-like services.’”

What were you thinking, Kiwis?

Another question. Along with what I have to assume is the contractual terms, ‘acts of wizardry and other wizard-like services,’ do you have a ‘but not if’ clause mentioning things the official wizard can’t do or say? Such as:

“I love women, I forgive them all the time, I’ve never struck one yet.”


“Never strike a woman because they bruise too easily is the first thing, and they’ll tell the neighbors and their friends…and then you’re in big trouble.”


In August, he posted an image on Facebook promoting what he called his “Save the Males” campaign, inviting people to help “protect the latest endangered species.”

Said wizard, whose name is Saruman — nah, just kidding, his name is Ian Brackenbury Channell and he is 88 years old, seems to be sort of bummed by losing his gig. “I don’t like being canceled,” he told a news site.

I guess he’s available, so…See headline above.

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